Cooler Chat: Tremendous New Trend Taking Over Towson High School

Monday morning, 9:22am. You walk out of first period math class feeling half awake and overcome by a lesson you did not fully understand. Things are looking glum. You notice that your parched lips need to be remedied. You see in the vague distance a… a water cooler?

A water cooler.

“I haven’t seen one of these bad boys around,” you quietly ponder to yourself.

As you approach the crisp, blue cooler you see the bright white cone cups, reminiscent of a cherry snowball on a hot summer’s day during a younger, more innocent time. You snatch an enticing paper cup and reach for the switch when suddenly-

“Hey [insert your name here], Mondays, am I right? Hgyah hgyah hgyah!”

It’s your long time bud, Danny! Certainly a chance meeting, your interaction brightens the otherwise bummed out morning and a new feeling of invigoration gets you ready for the day’s activities to come.

What was just mentioned in the preceding paragraphs was just one of the many instances the new water cooler installations will endlessly benefit both the student body and faculty of Towson High School.

Why the coolers? It’s quite simple: There’s been a yuck-storm of polluted water around certain schools, such as Dulaney, Dundalk, and even right here at Towson High School. Believe it or not, Towson’s pipes are packed with rust accumulated over a long history of fountain usage.

Baltimore County could have spent the time and resources replacing each and every troublesome pipe system, but it’s quite evident implicating water coolers was the economical decision.

Rewind to one year ago: Lethargic school attendees sadly sipping the rusty-tinted fountain water, miserably waiting for the lukewarm torture to end.

This year, the tables have turned, and we are talking about a full 180 turn, that’s how big of a turn the tables have taken. Not only do students get the marvelous opportunity of consuming clear, crisp, clean drinking water, but they get to interact with students in a sophisticated manner never-before achieved through hydration methods.

Senior Ryan Wholtman agreed, “Yes, the water coolers were definitely a good addition and investment. They add a very professional aspect to everyday conversations. I feel like we are in an office each time I grab for a cup and pour some water. Great talk and great water for months to come!”

It’s a simple fact that the water coolers are popular around THS. However, as a word of warning, do not put water bottles to close to the faucets. This wondrous privilege could turn sour come flu season when sickness spreads faster than a hot trolley on a mid-summer’s journey.

Remember to keep this warning in mind and more importantly enjoy the revitalizing water coolers to the fullest Towson-General-Tradition-of-Excellence potential.