Halloween Special: The Mystery of the Towson High Bathroom Ghost

The history of Towson high school is very long and rich in the tradition of excellence. But what if I told you this building has a much deeper, darker past, usually overlooked by the common man?

Mass hysteria has swept over the underclassmen as reports of a spectral being haunting the first-floor boys’ bathroom have become increasingly more common.

Freshman Jody Wilson remembers his encounter: “I went into the bathroom by the boy’s football locker room during my lunch period last Thursday, and as I started taking a whiz, a spooky man popped out and said “SPAGHETT!” I’m very thankful I was already taking a leak because things really could’ve gone downhill for me.” He then began to fade off, legs trembling due to the traumatic experience.

Sophomore Ricky Smith reminisces about his meeting with the ghost: “As I walked into the bathroom to smoke my cherry-flavored vape, I saw a strange-looking figure in the corner near the showers. I turned away for a moment and the next thing I know, the mysterious vision was right next to me. He gave a little complement about my vape. Traumatized, I reluctantly thanked the being, then he gave a quick smooch on my cheek. I felt oddly aroused. He then shouted about pasta or something, and vanished from my sight. I want to meet this ghost again, but he’s so elusive!”

So how does this ghost remain so elusive? I did some background research on this spectral being, and found that 30 years ago, a custodian by the name of Sigmund Withers mysteriously went missing over the Christmas holiday break. When students returned to school the following January, there was no trace of Sigmund besides a pile of spaghetti found in a stall of the very bathroom that the alleged ghost has been haunting.

I am not saying that the phantom is Mr. Sigmund. After all, there is still much to be discovered about the incident. I’m not even sure if he died. However, after that incident Mr. Sigmund was never seen around Towson high school ever again.

I asked former director of BCPS janitors, Bill Gibbons, to expand on that fateful incident that occurred decades ago, and he gave me more detail than I could’ve hoped for:

“I’m not going to lie, Sig was an awful custodian. All he seemed to care about was pasta. I had gotten reports from Towson High about a ‘subpar cleaning guy,’ so one day I came to visit and run a performance evaluation. Sure enough, the guy was a mess. He didn’t clean much of anything, and kept a bag of cheap spaghetti in his pocket which he sometimes snacked on. After the evaluation finished, I told him improvements he needed to make and he responded by throwing a real bad fit. From that point on, people say that all he did was hide in the first-floor bathroom, mackin’ on spaghetti. After hearing continued complaints, I had no choice but to fire him, but I figured I’d wait until after Christmas break. Sure enough, he was gone without a trace before I could get to him.”

As he tried to share more, I shouted “No dice!” and ran out the door, for I had already gotten all the info I needed. It was time to find out for myself the real-life force in the bathroom

According to Bill’s story, Sigmund could very well be the ghost, having returned to Towson with spiteful vengeance in mind after years of neglect! But there was only one way to find out whether the soul of Sigmund was, in fact, the ghost: Go into the bathroom myself.

I kept a log of what happened during my hunt for the truth during the Monday darkness of October 26th, 2015:

9:23pm: I’ve made my way into the school using the secret key hidden in the [classified]

9:38pm: In the bathroom now. Things are quite dark though, thinking about turning on some lights.

9:40pm: Turned on lights. Was getting uncomfortable.

9:53pm: Got bored, decided to go on phone.

10:29pm: Phone has become low on battery, may not last much longer.

10:57pm: Phone has died, beginning to think battery has gone faulty.

10:59pm: Couldn’t take it any longer, left bathroom and on way home now.

The investigation held was inconclusive, and left me looking for answers

until the moment. On my way to school, I listened to my everyday Spotify playlist, and heard a commercial about some starving children in Africa. That’s when it hit me: the ghost only spooks young boys!

As soon as I entered that bus loop lobby door, I frantically grabbed the first freshman I could find and whizzed past the administration before they could say something about school ID’s and went straight into the haunted bathroom to share my plan with dweeb-looking, pasty freshman boy

The plan was simple:

1. Set up camcorder

2. have pasty freshman dweeb-boy go into bathroom during each of his four periods

3. Listen closely as to whether the ghost comes out to haunt pasty freshman dweeb-boy or not

4. Catch ghost in the act and ask for its identity

5. Any necessary procedures after catching ghost

First period was dry, as dweeb-boy went into the bathroom only the usual. But as he went in there second period, the ghost gave dweeb-boy a fright! As soon as I heard that pre-puberty shriek, I dashed inside the bathroom, adrenaline kicking like it never has before, and tackled the spirit to the ground!

But that’s when I thought to myself, “If this is a ghost, how come I can tackle it?” That’s when the shock happened. “SPAGHETT!” All I had heard was starting to come together! Jody Wilson’s encounter! Sigmund’s spaghetti snacks! The little African children! The ghost in the room wasn’t a ghost at all! It was an old man!

That’s right, an old man, in all his wrinkly physical being, spooking underclassmen in the first-floor bathroom of Towson High School. I asked the man to identify himself, and he promptly said “Mr. Withers”

Sigmund Withers! So it was the custodian! I took the smelly old man straight to the office, but as we approached the door he slipped through my grasp with a tricky tickle and no evidence was left of him…

…Except for the footage! As I studied the film, I found that he slyly climbed through the bathroom window in the morning and hid out in a stall, carefully peeking his head over the top to see who entered. Without making a sound, he’d tip-toe out of the stall and suddenly smooch whatever boy was in the bathroom at the time, as long as he was under 5’4”. In fact, he smooched three different lads before even reaching our subject!

As any good investigator would do, I reported my results to the administration. They tried to cover up their ignorance about the situation by claiming “Oh, he’s been a problem for a while” and “Yeah, we’ve been trying to crack down on perverts like this”

So for now, Towson High School is safe of any ghosts, leaving the little boys happy and worry free during any bathroom break.